Everybody is a victim these days so it’s worth at least having some kind of ranking system in place to see if they’re a worthy victim, like maybe ten-percent of people are, or a fake victim, like the other ninety-percent. In the case of Monica Davila, let’s put her in the ninety-percent.
According to fast-growing Texas lore, Davila was rifling through sets of photographs she took of her family at Garner State Park about 100 miles west of San Antonio when she noticed a boob-flashing photobomber in her family snapshot. Heaven’s to Besty. Though not Ross, that’s racist.
Like most people, Davila’s first instinct was to call the cops and report the woman flashing her boob in her otherwise adorable family photo. And like most cops, the people on the other end of the line tried not to laugh while pretending to take Davila’s police report seriously and promised to call her back with any updates. Yo, Bruce, get me that mug book of bare tits in the area and let’s see if we can ID those boobs.
Davila must’ve sensed the cops weren’t going to do anything, and not provide her any sympathy, so she took to Facebook to speak about this horrible offense against decency. Smartly, Davila added in the fact that the family had taken the State Park trip in honor of her husband’s grandmother who had recently passed away. Nothing to do with the underlying offense, but when you’re playing the victim card, use all your cards.
“We’re trying to recreate memories. Having some chick’s boob isn’t allowing us to do that.”– Monica Davila, super fun person
Sadly for Davila, while a few nattering ninnies agreed with her sense of outrage, most people online obviously just said things like “nice boobs”. Oh, what a tough world to be a saint in.
While Davila says she hopes the woman in the photos is publicly shamed and presumably burned at some stake, the photobombing titty-flasher remains at large, and likely to strike again. Lock. Your. Doors.
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