People hate Walmart for all the wrong reasons. It’s often tied to their business and employment practices, predatory domination of local mom and pop shops, or their suspect child slave labor manufacturing sources. All valid in some manner. But in reality, the biggest downside to shopping at Walmart — the crazy women. And now another woman arrested.
Breanna Michelle Randall Was Going Winona Ryder at a Walmart
It’s hard to imagine shoplifters aren’t quite aware that stores like Walmart employ multiple levels of “loss prevention” in their stores. This would include cameras, recognizable security officers, standard store employees on the lookout, and undercover security officers pretending to be other shoppers.
Apparently, Breanna Michelle Randall, 29, wasn’t aware, because she began stuffing her backpack with items off the shelves of the Walmart in California, Maryland. (Yes, that’s a real city name in Maryland, as is, Chevy Chase.)
Randall was observed removing items from their packaging before placing them in her backpack. In the electronics department, she tried the very same with a cellphone and a store employee told her to cut it out. She created some kind of disturbance to enable a break for the checkout area.
Before breezing through the checkout lines without paying for anything, Randall swiped a beverage from a cool and headed for the great outdoors. You do need to be certain to hydrate when shoplifting.
Once outside the store, Randall pulled the less than smart idea for a shoplifter — she started screaming at Walmart customers. This would be the time to start assuming drugs or mental issues played a role in this incident.
Police Arrived And It Didn’t Get Better
St. Mary’s County Sheriffs rolled up to the Walmart to confront Breanna Michelle Randall. According to arrest records, she could care less. Ignoring instruction from the officer, she continued to scream at people simply trying to leave with their shopping bags.
Cops arrested Randall. Once in the police cruiser, she went all cliche and started kicking at the windows. How much do you leg press, my dear?
Deputies searched Randall’s backpack and found a bunch of embarrassingly cheap cosmetics items and a pair of fake nails. Must have those.
Randall was arrested and charged with theft for the Walmart goodies, malicious destruction of property, presumably for her in-store damage, resisting arrest, and being a monster pain in the butt outside the store.
This Was Not Randall’s First Theft Rodeo
Back in 2016, there’s a record of the same Breanna Michelle Randall arrested for minor theft of less than $100.
You can do the math, but if Randall was arrested for five-finger discounting her merchandise in 2016, and again in 2019, what are the odds she did zero thieving between those dates. Check your fake nail inventories, people?